Sorry I haven't posted

I have been struggling with loss of appetite and off and on constipation. So I check Facebook and my email and that is about it. I have beenable to decrease the pain meeds and am takin Zofran 2/day now. Trying to wean off the dilaudid now.

I actually did some paperwork yesterday and need to pay bills this weekend and get my checkbook caught up. Also, with shaky fingers, it is hard to trim my fingernails, so they are way too long for me (perhaps normal for many).

Eddie started school last week and wishes summer wasn't over. He is with his dad this weekend. He is now as tall as I am.

Decided to go with COBRA over OMIP for the last three months of 2011 as I save a few hundred dollars because of acupuncture.

I guess that's all. Life isn't too exciting. Oh. I have a CT scan on Monday and perception on Friday. We will see what else to do after the CT scan on Monday.

Frustrated

A new anti nausea med (Raglan) seems to help, but I still have no appetite. I am afraid if I eat anything too solid, I will get bad constipation. In the meantime, I think I have lost even more weight, even though I try to force myself to eat something.

So I am frustrated. Afrid I will waste away to nothing.

Maybe I need to go into the hospital to get nutrients, fluids, and strength.

I feel like I am wasting away. But dad thinks I am gradually getting stronger. My fears are getting the worse of me today.

I did stay at Eddie's party for an hour yesterday, longer than I thought in the heat.

But I stayed home today while my patents went to the state fair with Eddie.

My family is trying to help me through this time. I am so thankful they are here.

Eddie, I am going to do all I can to be here for you. You are important to me. I love you very much.

Better today

I had pretty bad day of nausea and constipation/diarrhea yesterday. It was so bad that in the evening, my stomach and lower back were constantly cramping.

Fortunately, my rsdiation oncologist mentioned another drug that could help with nausea and moving things through the digestive tract: raglan. I startedvtaking it last night and a couple of hours later, the cramps in my belly and back stopped. And my bowels moved without hurting my back as before.

Thank goodness. So I feel better today, so I will be able to participate some in my son's birthday party today. And I feel I can eat more. Which will help me gain strength.

I have one more question to write before the party and I guess I should get to it.

Staying comfortable

Right now, the only comfortable position for my arms and shoulders seems to be lying down. When I go out in public, I have to keep my left arm up, which then causes me to tense up my right side, too. Even sitting up in my chair is uncomfortable or at a table.

My last arm radiation treatment is tomorrow so this week I hope to begin addressing the lymphedema, pain, and strength in my arms and I can get out and about more.

I need to ask my dad and Scott to clean out my Humanities office this week.

We are also going to try to hold a birthday party at the pool this coming Saturday for Eddie - a very belated one. ineed to find out how many kids from his class will be in town for the holiday week.

I do think things are getting incrementally better, but is frustrating just the same. My dad reminds me that for several weeks after her heart surgery, she was very weak, shaky, and mom did everything for her. Now, she is doing things for me and has even built the deck. So she is a good role model for me to follow. Slowly but surely, right?

Living with pain

As I am trying to recover from the WBR and the arm radiation, mostly by resting, I do live with constant pain. I mean, the fentanyl patch takes the worst of it away, but I do take every 4 or 5 hours for the arm and shoulder pain. I keep heat on my right shoulder and back but the front of my right shoulder, my bicep, forearm, and sometimes my right wrist hurt, so I keep heat on that, too. I guess the idea is to be comfortable, so I try to domthat as much as possible.

In the meantime, dad has taken over some duties tom take Ed on outings. Eddie is at swim swimming lessons now. I have said it before and will say it again - thank goodness for family!

I just wish I wouldn't tense up ny right shoulder. Not sure why. Well, anxiety, I guess. But I should concentrate on rest nd recuperation now, then worry about the anxiety later.

I plan to ask Dr. K not to start any heavy duty chemo for four to six weeks. I want to gain strength first. I will just do Herceptin and Zometa for two more cycles and then see whatnis next. I have Herxeptin this Friday. Hopefully that will keep things under control for now.

I continue to be thankfulmfor everyone's support! Thank you!

Turning point

I decided a couple of hours ago that today will be a turning point. Nowhere to go but up, right?

Eddie and I had a good talk today, good for both of us.

Friends continue their outpouring of support. Thank you for that.

The radiology tech, Tim, was a complete sweetheart and met me both yesterday and today to change my wound dressing. I really couldn't ask for a better support and care team.

Love to everyone!

A lot going on

On Monday the 25th, I saw Dr. K, the next day, I saw the nurse, on Wed, I saw the radiation oncologist, and yesterday, I saw the plastic surgeon in Portland. The end result is that there are a couple of smaller tumors growing under my left arm, near the armpit. So we did a planning session today and will start Radiation to both the brain and the arm on Monday. I have 8 more sessions of whole brain radiation and 15 more sessions of the arm. I am about ha
Way done with whole brain radiation.

30 days after radiation, I will have another brain MRI and probably a CT scan and can hopefully get on a clinical trial for the TDM-1 trial. But it is in Stockton, California and I would have to go every three weeks. That is what Dr. K is hoping for. Or I could start another kind of treatment here, like a Taxane. But we will cross that bridge when we come to it.

The tumor in my chest is growing, but as the wound care nurse said, it would probably be huge by now so it is good that I had the bulk of it taken out five weeks ago.

In the meantime, I am taking lots of drugs for side effects. Zofran for nausea (but maybe I can taper that off as the antibiotics gets out of my system), steroids for swelling in the brain which helps with headaches and nausea, dilaudid for pain (due to the growing tumors in my arm and increased swelling), Valium for anxiety and sleep, and Ibuprofen, I. Addition to Chinese herbs and supplements.

I am back to not sleeping, get weepy from the pain (controlled now with the Dilaudid), I am a little nauseous, but eating a lot and often helps with that. My appetite is picking up but it is a lot of little meals and I don't eat much. I am not very good company. I am gonna get through these next few weeks. I think next week will be the worst. Or maybe it was this week as I find the right combo of meds to control the side effects. I do think the steroids keep me from being so weepy and the pain meds help too.

It looks like my summer is shot. At least my dad, brother, and friend are building the deck. So I guess we concentrate on the back yard. I can't sit for long in a restaurant, so I am at home or at my appointments.

I am not posting much on the blog or on Facebook because my arms hurt. Maybe now that I take Dilaudid, I can post more again.

Also say Happy Birthday to my son today .. . He turns 11! Wow!

Enjoying myself in Lincoln City

I have been enjoying myself so far in Lincoln City, but I still need to rest a lot. I wasn't nauseous yesterday but was today and that is because I started alternating my meds -yesterday I had the antibiotic and today the Tykerb. Turns out the Tykerb gives me more nausea. I was nauseous on our way to the coast on Saturday, until after lunch, same as today. Because I was nauseous Saturday, I decided to alternate the meds so I could enjoy myself more.

Took two naps Saturday evening, slept okay Sat night. Didn't sleep real well last night. My arm and shoulder get achey and I can't get comfortable. I wake up every 90 to 120 minutes at night.

I am also not wearing the compression sleeve because it seems that my infection in the armpit gets worse when I do. So, I will put up with a fat arm until that wound heals. Maybe I won't get an infection since there won't be open skin.

I don't know if I reported this or not, but the neurosurgeon advised me to do whole brain radiation. I think I will do gamma knife for now and then do WBR radiAtion later this summer. I have been getting a headache behind my right eye on occasion, which makes me think the tuner is there.

So it is a hard thing - take the antibiotic and feel better and heal the wound or take the Tykerb to keep any more brain tumors from growing and feel more nauseous (my digestive system is still healing so I think that is why I feel nauseous with it.) I am erring on feeling good right now since I am at the coast and hope I can get gamma knife for the tumor next week, when Eddie is out of town with his dad.

Have taken several walks on the beach and try to practice my "shee-shee-whoo" breath when I do. Turns out I can walk to Roads End Park, walk to the beach, then walk to the casino,then walk on the beach a short way until I find the path that takes me to them road our house is on. Takes maybe an hour, but usually longer since I spend time in the casino. So far, I think I am $30-40 to the good.

So it is good. The weather hasn't been great so I can't hang out on the deck as much. But good walks on the beach. I do feel more relaxed since I don't have appointments.

We are all fairly lazy. Eddie is having fun with his cousins. So it is good. I just wish to he'll I felt stronger and slept better.

Pictures - My Turban Bandage, Flowers from the Yard, and Wings and Waves

I am going to upload a bunch of pictures - they may be in random order. But they show my turn bandage (the white one that I had to wear for a week and the colored design I created to cover the white tape), flowers in my yard (my favorite irises and now the lovely roses and one poppy), and Eddie at the new waterpark north of here . . . also at his school carnival and his school musical.  Enjoy!

Anxiety leads to less sleep . . . but the day is ending on a good note

I started Tykerb today. I've had it before with hardly any side effects - a tad bit of diarrhea until my body gets used to it. Some white zits on the face, but otherwise, I tolerate it well. But I wasn't sure how it was going to interact with the anti-seizure medicine (which also, coincidentally, has diarrhea as a side effect).

Before bed and throughout the night, I was anxious about taking it. I want to take it so I can start taking care of any cancer cells in my noggin - and in my skin - but anxious about potential drug interactions.

I was also anxious about my decision to do the surgery next week, not sure that I was really making the right decision.

As a consequence, I only got about 4-5 hours sleep. I was tired all morning. I took Ed to school anyway and then got the oil changed in my car. But I did have some diarrhea and felt a little shaky as a result.

Then on my way home, I got a call from Eddie at school - he apparently needed something I thought was already graded and I put it away, so I had to run it to his school.

Then I saw the radiation oncologist. I was so tired and anxious that I admit to being weepy with both the radiation nurse and the radiation oncologist. The nurse said that my weepiness was to be expected and that my anxiety was warranted. But she also added that I did look really well, under the circumstances. My heart rate was still high as was my blood pressure - either still getting the steroids out of my system and/or withdrawing from them. She was very reassuring.

The radiation oncologist came in - and either she or the nurse (I can't remember now) - and they said that at their morning staff meeting, my name was mentioned and I guess it was generally agreed that I had made the right decision to do surgery next week. She understood the reasons - especially that the damn tumor was so visible to my own eyes and she said she might make the same decision to do the surgery so she wouldn't have to look at it anymore. She also said that I was "strong-minded" and that was what a lot of people admired about me and how I take charge of my own care.

I told her about the research I found about brain mets - that people who stay on Herceptin actually survive fairly long after a diagnosis of brain mets as long as the cancer is controlled below the neck.

She was also happy that I chose to take Tykerb for its preventive effect on the brain. I will be able to stay on Tykerb through the surgery. She was going to check and make sure that I could stay on it through radiation.

After some discussion, we decided on 14 more treatments of radiation as she can deliver a smaller dose. If I were to only do 9 or 10 sessions, they'd have to do a larger dose, but research has shown that there can be some cognitive defects in the long -term (years later) and since the research shows that it is possible that I will be alive a longer time than Dr. K said I might, she wanted to opt for the smaller dose. She also assured me that everyone admired how I continued to live my life - doing fun things and working and all - with everything I've been through.

I won't be prescribed steroids unless I start getting nausea or other symptoms that indicate that there is increased swelling. YAY!

We decided that we'd start the Monday after the surgery - beginning June 27 - and doing 14 treatments. Just in time for us to go to the coast the next week, where I can recuperate.

So, I get another week to recuperate from everything that has happened thus far and adjust to taking Tykerb (I see more yogurt in my future), then surgery, and four days later, I start radiation. Three weeks of that and then a week at the coast.

I received hugs from the nurse - I think the doctor, too - and one of the radiation techs. The doctor's son is the same age as my son and we talked about how both boys have recently discovered laser tag. I told everyone we were taking my son to Chuck E. Cheese to celebrate his last day of school. Eddie and I have gone there the last 2 or 3 years and now, as Eddie says, it's "tradition", so he really wanted to go.

But since I don't quite trust myself to drive long distances on my own, I invited mom and dad to go with me. They went to the mall and shopped a bit, while I read a book ("Water for Elephants" that I borrowed from my colleague, B.), and Eddie used all his tokens. A huge thank you to dad for driving. I think it was nice for all of us to have a change in scenery.

On the way home, Dr. K's office called, but didn't leave a message. So, I called back. The nurse called me back later and we finally figured out that they wanted to tell me the results of the echocardiogram from the other day. I was nervous that there was something wrong and I'd have to go off Herceptin or something.

The news? Everything is within normal limits. My heart is fine - my ejection fraction was within normal limits. The high heart rate and blood pressure is probably more due to the steroids than anything else.

Whew. Thank goodness SOMETHING is normal. Given everything else that's happened, normal is good. It's very very good.

I should have a good night's sleep tonight as all that I worried about last night is okay. Only some diarrhea (which I will get under control), my decision to have surgery was sound, and my heart is fine. And, Eddie and I got to carry on "tradition" with my parents' help.

Thank you, everyone, for continuing to keep me in your thoughts, prayers, etc. I very much appreciate it. I am good.

What a Day, What a Day, What a Day

And, I made it! I'm tired, but I made it.

I went to wound care first at 8:30am. The area with no skin is smaller by about 1/2 cm - it's now 4cm x 2.5cm, down from 4x3cm on Tuesday. That's good.

She also changed the dressing on the chest tumor. More of the skin has broken down. After I talked to the nurses at the Infusion Center and the wound care nurse, I think I'm gonna try to talk my local surgeon into removing the damn thing sooner rather than later.

Then, I ran over to the Social Security office in Albany to drop off paperwork. There was no line, so I was in and out of there faster than I thought I might be.

Then, off to Ambulatory Infusion to get Herceptin and Zometa. I will have an echogram next week to check my heart as it has been since Feb 2010 since I had one. (Sheesh, I thought I had one more recently than that.) My heart rate is about 90-100 beats a minute, which I think is related to the steroids. The heart rate was also elevated when I was anemic in April. So, they just want to check and make sure everything is okay. I haven't heard yet about the Tykerb. I will call on Monday to see what the status of getting that drug is.

While I was there, I worked on edits to a chapter I wrote last summer for about an hour.

After three hours there, I picked up Eddie - he had an appointment. Then, I actually came home and worked on edits again for another hour.

Then, one of my colleagues dropped off Chinese food for our dinner tonight, which we then promptly took to Eddie's school so he could go to the carnival. I was really hungry when I first got there and was cranky, but once I got food in my belly, I visited with several people, including one teacher whose husband recently died because of cancer. So many of the other parents and teachers told me that they were praying for me and offered support. Thank you!

Right before I left, Eddie went into the dunk tank and got dunked a couple of times. He was having a ball.

I got home about 7:45. A long day. But I made it through. I'm tired, of curse, and happy to be horizontal. My lymphedema arm is a little achey, but less so than the tendonitis in my right forearm.

Life is good. I'm glad I was able to hang with Eddie at his carnival. I feel very happy to have life as normal as I can make it for him.

Happy weekend!

Visit with the neurosurgeon

I saw the neurosurgeon (which reminds me that I have yet tom post the pic of me with colored bandages) today. I asked how long it would take for the bone to heal back (he cut the bone much like you cut the top of a pumpkin for a Jack-o-lantern) and I don't recall that he gave me an exact date, so I said something about broken arms or legs which take six weeks or whatever to knit back together. He just said, "awhile". He then said that the earliest he would want me to do whole brain radiation was the last week of June or first week of July for that very reason -radiation delays healing.

That is about when I thought I might start. I didn't tell him about the whole Christmas thing, but I did say that everyone says I still have cancer cells running around in my head and he said, "well, that is just an assumption" as if he didn't believe that.

I just realized that one thing I meant to ask him or Dr. K is whether or not the pathology report actually says these tumors are breast cancer . . .

He took the stitches out and then said I could wash my scalp with mild soap. So I did when I came home. I am going to see him again next week and he will finish shaving the rest of my hair off for me, in addition to making sure I am healing as I should be. But shaving may be a moot point - my hair starting falling out again, from the one session of whole brain radiation. As my sister said "Well, that must be a sign that it worked". Yep, Rena, I think you are right!

There seemed to be more necrotic tissue on the chest tumor - at least, it is draining more and then when I changed the dressing, it was bleeding more. That might be a sign that that gets taken off sooner rather than later. I see the wound care nurse tomorrow and see what she says.

Today was a good day, even if I am so so tired (got about three one-hour naps last night, and an hour nap yesterday afternoon. Saw my therapist and talked about the Christmas comment but then talked of future plans. Then my aunt and uncle came down from Portland for a visit. It was fun. Thank you Aunt Nancy and Uncle Alex!

Tomorrow, I see wound care and then get Herceptin and Zometa. Then in the evening is Eddie's school carnival. I will hang out with him for half the time and then his dad will take over as I am not sure of my stamina. It will be a good day!

Mosaic today

I had a relatively low-key day today. I woke up shaky and with some diarrhea, but within a couple of hours, The shakiness disappeared. I was tired all day, though, as I had only 2-3 hours sleep.

I worked mostly on grouting and placing tiles on my design. I will try to post pics when I can.

Eddie had a tough day at school today. I wonder just how much of his problem is due to what's going on with me. He is why I need to be around for years to come, to help him through days like this as he feels like I am the only one he can talk to about days like today.

Tomorrow, I have therapy - will probably talk about what Dr. K said. Then I get this bandage off my head - yay! My head is really starting to itch! Then Uncle Alex and Aunt Nancy will be done for a visit.

No other real news, other than I get Herceptin and Zometa on Friday.

Good News

I spent some time this evening looking at survival rates for brain mets from metastatic breast cancer.

I read studies with all sorts of numbers and averages and such. But I won't report them here because I don't want to put any kind of timeline on my life. I just need to not think about those numbers.

But it seems that surgery followed by whole brain radiation increases my surival rate. And, I think Tykerb will also help keep it all under control. There are a few chemotherapy drugs that cross the blood brain barrier.

But even more important to my longer term survival is if my "extracranaial disease" is controlled. And, according to the last CT of my body in late March, other than scar tissue and calcium deposits in my bone marrow, my "extracranial disease" is controlled. In these cases, it appears that people survive longer than the one Christmas my doctor talked about.

So, I am comforted by what I read. Because I want to live long enough to see Eddie into adulthood.

Camp Cot in the Sun

I spent about an hour this afternoon, laying on a camp cot in the sun in my backyard while Eddie played in the water and in his mud pit. It was the first decent day in a long time - for me anyway.

It was relaxing. I was tired and needed to close my eyes for a bit.

I had a productive morning and afternoon. Since I have to wear this silly white bandage for a week, I decided I wanted to to decorate it somehow. I could wear scarves, I suppose, but it's going to be hot this weekend (in the 80's) and couldn't bear to think how much hotter that might make my head. I finally figured out a way to take this paper tape I had (which I had been using for wounds) and color strips in a colorful pattern. Then, I took strips of the tape and put it over the white bandage I went home with yesterday.

It turned out fairly well, even if I do say so myself. I'll try to post pics tomorrow.

I tried to talk to someone at the disability insurance company but it turns out that my claims person was out today. I did find out, however, that they didn't have the paperwork from my doctor. So, I called his office to FAX the paperwork. I *think* that the records person accidentally sent me the copy meant for insurance since I ended up with two copies, so I brought it back to my doctor and they will FAX it today.

I also had to get some wound care dressings for the weakened.

I paid some bills.

I thought I found a house at the coast to rent in July, but they wanted us to rent it for a week minimum. Can't afford that, so now I need to do some more searching. Maybe tomorrow.

A friend came to visit - she ate dinner with us. Thanks, B!

Four more days of steroids. My mouth and tongue are tender. I can't eat anything spicy. I swish with Nistatin and then swallow to help keep away fungal infections. I also swish with aloe vera juice as that seems to help, too. My tummy sometimes feels gurgly so I eat crackers. My other craving is mini chocolate donuts. I don't like my tummy to get empty as it bothers me more then.

My right two fingers feel numb. Sometimes, there's a bit along the side of my right thumb does too. That should go away over time.

No big plans tomorrow except maybe to get a little wading pool for Eddie and his play in the backyard. Maybe some more summer shirts that I can wear.

Lazy Saturday

Today was a lazy day. I didn't change out of my jammies until noon. I watched movies this morning. I also had a headache - a slight one - that extended from my neck to my temples and up on top of my head. Even now, into evening, I can still feel the headache. Not sure why.

I also didn't go to Urgent Care to change my dressing - I think it can wait until morning. I will see when I change out of my shirt and see how much bleeding there was. It'll be the first time since I was in the hospital that I haven't had the dressing changed daily. That's a good sign, that things are healing and I don't need to change the dressing as often.

This morning, I said on Facebook that I needed to grade papers and pay bills. I also thought about cleaning my bathroom and washing my sheets. But in the end, I didn't do any of those things.

I did take Eddie to Wacky Bounce. It was tough until I could sit on the couch. It was a little uncomfortable in the tall stools. I am trying to keep my left arm elevated because of lymphedema.

After dinner, Eddie and I went to the park for about an hour. It was getting a little chilly and windy by then, but the fresh air did me good. I even forgot about the headache.

Now, I have a bit of a headache and I keep tensing my right arm. But it was a good lazy day. I guess that's okay since I only got about 7 hours sleep the last two nights. I nap a little in the evenings, too. But overall, I'm doing okay. I love lazy days.

Appointments and Errands and Work Emails

I had three appointments today and then lunch with a friend and colleague.

The wound care nurse said that, under the circumstances, the wound and the growth are doing okay. The growth actually shrunk to about 17 x 13cm. She also said that, in her experience (and she hasn't had many patients with cancer), growths/wounds like this have very compromised tissue and it tends to bleed easily. It was bleeding awhile ago, but the powder seemed to keep it from bleeding. Lately, I've been using turmeric and she thinks that it is keeping it from getting infected and from bleeding. In other words, the wound/growth could be worse.

I also saw my acupuncturist and she treated me for the fatigue and anemia and pain in my armpit/shoulder mostly, but since I am also working to remove my ego from many sources of frustration and stress, she put in a couple of needles at "constitutional" (basic DNA level, which is pretty deep) points. What was interesting is that after she left so I can just sit there, one point, my third knuckle on my left hand, just started throbbing. That's the San Gao 4 point, which has to do with my essential self. The funny thing is that there was no needle there. She thought the fact that point was reacting was a good sign that energy was moving to that area to help my body remember my basic DNA (I think), which cancer has hi-jacked. The idea, I think, is for my body to remember my essential constitution (i.e., pre-cancer) and recreate that. So, I had a reaction that she considered a positive step toward my healing.

Lunch with my colleague and friend, K., was fun. I think we're going to put in a pre-proposal with another colleague to continue some work in Alaska. There's some good positive energy there, which was really cool. My issue is that the pre-proposal is a quick turn-around. We have to submit a 4-pager by April 6 and my surgery is April 1. So, I need to work on as much as I can before my surgery. And, that's on top of edits to an article, my syllabus, figuring out Dropbox, etc. K. and I also had to do a little debriefing from our Hawaii workshop.

Then, it was off to my teeth cleaning. I hate getting my teeth cleaned. But Monday evening, one of my crowns started aching a little. But she didn't see anything of concern. It just might be bruised from chewing a lot of gum or something. And, amazingly, the teeth cleaning was fairly easy and gentle. Usually, I feel like she's poking my gums something awful.

Eddie and I also ran a couple of errands. He started rereading the Diary of a Wimpy Kid books, so we got the last two in the series. He's going through one of those books a day.

Now, I'm just trying to get caught up with work emails. Man, they keep piling up.

Tonight, I'm just gonna watch reruns on TV. And, work a little on my syllabus.

I am enjoying watching things bloom and bud. But it feels like an awfully cool spring to date.

Countdown: 8.5 days and 17 dressings changes to go.

A Good Couple of Days

On Sunday, I used a LePatisserie gift certificate, given to me by a friend and colleague, to buy some yummy treats that I (and my family) snacked on all day. We had a croissant, an almond croissant, a "ganache", and a mixed fruit tart. YUM! I think the sugar, though, woke me up every couple of hours that night. Most of the day was spent doing a little cleaning around my room (filing away papers) and I ran some errands with mom. Plus, I watched some Harry Potter movies.

On Monday, I had to go to a faculty meeting (goodbye winter fellowship! I'm so sorry to see you go!). That signals the loss of freedom as I will be expected to do more service around the department again. Some members of the department spent the first 45 minutes complaining. I wont' say about what; suffice it to say that I think it's a moot point and is not something I want to waste any energy on. We finally got to the business at hand after that.

Then I took Eddie and his classmate to Putters Family Entertainment in Eugene so they could play laser tag. The boys also played in the Arcde and they played mini-golf. I think they had a great time.

Yesterday, Eddie, a friend of mine and her corgi, and I went to Lincoln City. We stopped and walked on the beach in Newport (just a few minutes as it was sprinkling) and then had lunch. Then off to Chinook Winds Arcade, where Eddie played in the Arcade again. He asked to go to their day care center while my friend and I went to the outlet mall (found four shirts, a hood, and a pair of khaki cargo pants for dad for $40). We then had time to spend about 30 minutes at the casino. After that, we went to the beach at Road's End and other than a slight breeze, it was beautiful. The sun was shining through some high clouds and the tide was high. We had a nice short walk, then we stopped at McMenamin's Lighthouse Brewpub and had ice cream - Eddie had a vanilla milkshake and my friend and I had marionberry crumble with ice crea. The dessert was everything I shouldn't eat (other than the berries), but I figured I was on vacation. We got home about 7pm. I was tired, but pleasantly so.

Today - appointments. Wound care nurse, acupuncture, and a teeth cleaning. Also lunch with a colleague and friend. I need to pick up some stuff at work and then I'll take Eddie to Wacky Bounce, where I'll work on my spring term syllabus.

Tomorrow - a CT scan and a visit with my oncologist. Then, work. Maybe bring Ed to Wacky Bounce again.

Spring Break Plans

Yesterday, I worked on edits for an article in my office. (Eddie is at his dad's house this weekend.) Then I treated myself by driving to Spirit Mountain Casino and playing for a few hours. In the end, after about 4 hours of play, I broke even. AT one point, I was $30 up. It was fun just being on my own.

Today, I need to do some work around the house. Laundry. Filing papers. Dust my room. Mop the spare bathroom. Clean the big bathroom. Maybe take some stuff to Goodwill, in the ongoing mission to declutter the house. Eddie comes home around 6pm.

Tomorrow, I will take Eddie and a classmate to laser tag in Eugene.

Tuesday, it looks like Eddie and I might go to the Coast with a friend and her dog (Eddie really likes this dog).

Wednesday, I have three appointments and lunch with a colleague.

Thursday, I have a CT scan and an appointment with my oncologist.

Friday, I may take Eddie to Portland to OMSI - and then later on, pick up a friend from the airport. I may wait and take Eddie to Portland the next day or the day after. We'll have to see how things work out.

I plan to work as much rest in there as possible. I also need to work on a syllabus for my Spring Term class, Research Design. And, figure out how to use Dropbox.

A busy but fun week is emerging.

Countdown: 12 days and 24 dressing changes - 23 after I shower this morning. Surgery will be so welcome. No matter how I do the dressing, it leaks out somewhere. The damn thing is draining so much. I might have to go to three dressing changes a day.

A Friday

I canceled my dental appointment today - figured if I'm fighting some infection, I shouldn't have dental work done.

I took Eddie to school. Then relaxed for a bit, took mom to the hospital, then went to my office to meet with a student. We had a great conversation - this is one of the reasons why I love my job.

But because I was still tired, I came home. Watched a movie. Tried to work on a syllabus, then picked Eddie up from school.

Relaxed some more. Worked a bit more on the syllabus.

Then, it was time to go to Eddie's school's auction. The food was good and got caught up on the latest with a couple of other moms. I helped a bit with data entry on the silent auction items, then I got tired when I finished that part, took Eddie and came home. Good thing, too, my dressing was just starting to leak.

Dad was supposed to come home today, but she had a bit of a panic attack and had some arrhythimia, so they decided to keep her until tomorrow.

I'm going to take Eddie to play laser tag tomorrow and we'll meet the son of another of the Puttin' on the Pink models. That will be fun. Other than that, pay bills, submit claims to the health care spending account, work on a syllabus, and work on a powerpoint for Monday's presentation.

Whew.

Oh, I forgot. OHSU is not able to schedule the surgery until April 22nd. Something about how one of the docs didn't have an 8-hour block of time for the surgery. Which sucks because the mass under my armpit is growing slowly and causing some more pain. My brother accidentally bumped into my right shoulder yesterday - and his shoulder hit one of the growths. It hurt and now that particularly growth has like a black or dark purple bruise. In other words, the sooner I have surgery, the better.

I'm going to have a Herceptin treatment on Tuesday, but I'm thinking something more drastic is going to have to happen sooner rather than later.