Withdrawal Symptoms Suck

I am trying to wean myself off of Dilaudid, mostly because I don't really have much pain, only some muscles that keep wanting to tense up from my right shoulder blade, to my right shoulder, down my right arm, forearm, and hand, ending with tingling and numbness in the right hand.

The left surgical side hardly has any pain. So time to get off the Dilaudid. The nurse at Dr. F's (the local surgeon) feels that maybe I'm trying to do too much right now and maybe I shouldn't go off Dilaudid just yet. But I think it's time.

Since I started going to Dilaudid every 10-12 hours, I've had a headache. I also had a leg cramp in my lower right calf early Friday morning. I get hot flashes and woke up from one my cat naps last night sweating. I also got felt sick to my stomach after lunch - like right after it. We drove home from Portland and I felt sick the whole way. I came home and napped off and on for about an hour.

All but the headache are official symptoms of withdrawal, according to websites. But the plastic surgeon in Portland and the regular surgeon felt the headaches were Dilaudid withdrawal symptoms.

Dr. F's nurse suggested Valium to help with the right shoulder blade/shoulder pain. Then, a friend in Australia, V., also said Valium was used to help her wean from a pain medicine. So, I asked Dr. F and received a prescription for Valium last night. I just took the second dose. We'll see if it helps with the headache. It's okay if I don't move my head too fast. I am going to try to stay with Dilaudid every 12 hours for a day or two and then try to decrease it again.

In the meantime, I will make an appointment locally with my physical therapist about the lymphedema in the left arm. Dr. F wants to wait and see what happens with the lump on the breast bone for another couple of weeks, but if treatment doesn't shrink it, I will be looking at another surgery soon. Also, Dr. F will take out the catheter/port in my right arm since I don't really need it.

Dr. T at OHSU felt that the wound might have skin over it in another two weeks. The hypergranaulation, which occurs in several spots in the area, is causing the healing to go slower, but it's going. It even looks less red to me. I see the wound care nurse again this afternoon.

Today, I've got class and I will also meet with a candidate - right after lunch and for dinner. But I might have to skip dinner depending on how I feel.

Have a good day everyone.

"'Cuz Two out of Three Ain't Bad"

The last few days, I've had a headache (from Friday evening to today, that extends from the back of my neck to my temples and on the top of my head). I've also had a leg cramp in my right calf early Friday morning. And, I've also had several hot flashes in the last few days.

When I looked up symptoms for Dilaudid withdrawal, I learned that leg cramps and hot flashes are common.

Two out of three ain't bad.

Not sure where the headache is coming from, but my guess it's part of the Dilaudid withdrawal. I'm trying to wean myself from them. I've gone from one every 4-6 hours early last week, to one Dilaudid every 6-8 hours on Tues/Wed, to one every 8-12 hours Thurs/Fri/Sat. I didn't mean to do 12, but that's what happens when it comes to sleep and the timing of when I take the Dilaudid.

The left arm/surgical side doesn't hurt much. Now the lymphedema hurts more - like a bruise. It's the right arm that bothers me, but it helps when I try to relax it. So, I think that I can get by with just the Tylenol and Ibuprofen. (I only take Ibuprofen once a day.) So, I will try to go to one every 10-12 hours and then stretch that so that it's one every 12-14 hours for a few days and then make it 1/2 every 12-14 hours and then do away, eventually, with the half a pill. We'll see.

Tomorrow, I head to Portland to see the plastic surgeon. Then I see the local surgeon in town.

I guess that means today, I need to grade papers, pay bills, and help Eddie. Yesterday was my day to be lazy. Today is my day to do some work. I feel like it, so I guess that's good!

I plan to keep weaning myself from the Dilaudid. I'll let you know how it goes.

A Productive Day

I managed to finish my list of to-do's today, which was nice considering how I felt yesterday with the withdrawal symptoms. Today, I have only taken half a pill, a quarter of one this morning and a quarter this evening. I was just getting the chills before I remembered to take it. It took an hour or so, but I finally got rid of the chills.

The radiation oncology dept. called me today to set up a consult with one of their doctors, but the only appointment was tomorrow afternoon, so I scheduled it for next week. Then, they called back with a morning appointment but it was the same time as another one that I have and I really want to go to that one. It's funny. I started complaining about the modules during the first or second week of July, but it took the docs about 5-6 weeks to biopsy them and now that they did, they want me to start NOW! But I am heading to the Coast tomorrow and I will not delay. They made me wait over a month, now they can wait a week. Most of the pain is gone - just a twinge and Tylenol takes care of that.

I had a productive day, ran several errands this am, met with a student, made phone calls, reserved a car for our trip to the Coast, picked up more herbs from my acupuncturist, hinge out with Eddie in the backyard, finished doing an assessment of an online course, recorded myself reading a chapter I wrote for a college class at Alaska Anchorage, sealed the tile on our fence project, and started to pack for the Coast.

Yep, we head to south Lincoln City (near Mo's) tomorrow morning. It is supposed to be an unprecedented 80 degrees in Lincoln City tomorrow. We'll take off around 11:30am and get there about 1pm. We can't get into the house until 4pm, so we will eat and play on the beach until then.

I cannot wait! I so love the Coast. The ocean relaxes me like nothing else. I promise to post pics. We will have four kiddos (Eddie, his cousins, and my niece's friend), my folks, my brother Scott, my sister, Rena, and me.

Walks on the beach, maybe a visit to the arcade/casino, maybe a visit to the Outlet stores and antique and books stores. Walks on the beach. And, oh yeah, walks on the beach!

Zimbabwe Festival and Withdrawl Symptoms

I went to the Zimbabwe Festival today with a couple of friends today. Listening to the marimba bands was really kinda cool and I had fun browsing the arts and crafts booths. I bought a $5 pair of abalone and coral earrings, half of a cloth with a pretty floral blue and white pattern on a black background, and a small statuette of a mother carrying her child on her back. The statuette reminded me of Eskimo "umaqqing", which is when moms or older kids carried a baby on their backs under their parkas. It fits nicely in the palm of my hand, almost like a worry stone. I have a turtle necklace that I bought in Hawaii last year with a baby turtle on it's back. I figure the two remind me of one major reason why I continue in my efforts to heal myself from this cancer: my son.

Well, that got kinda heavy! In other news, I felt a bit shaky and had chills with flu-like symptoms with occasional sweats. Thought it was a digestive issue or I caught some kind of flu or ate something wrong yesterday.

I had last taken a 50-mg tramadol pill yesterday at noon. Tramadol is the name of the pain pill I have taken for almost four weeks now. Two weeks ago, I had as many as 6 or 7 pills in one day. But on the last week, I had gradually de erased it as my pain lessened. I think last week, I may have had only 3 or 4 at a time. Then on Thursday, the UW doctor said I could take anti-inflammatories for 72 hours to decrease the inflammation and stop taking the pain pills.

By Friday, I had less pain, so I think I may have only had 1 or 2 pills all day. Then just one on Saturday. I woke up at 3am feeling achey all over and couldn't get comfortable and go back to sleep. I finally took some Tylenol and fell back asleep at 4:30am.

This evening, I still didn't feel right, with muscle aches and chills and a bit of pain in my armpit, so I took a pain pill in the hopes that I could get a good night's sleep. Within an hour, the chills and aches were gone, so I began to suspect that I was going through withdrawals.

Looked up the symptoms of withdrawals and, yep, that's exactly what's going on. So, I could either go cold turkey or gradually wean myself. I am going to opt for the latter because I have some things to do tomorrow, like laundry and a couple of work things, before we head to the Coast on Tuesday. So, my plan is to only take half a pill for two days then quarter of a pill for a. Ouple of days so I can enjoy the Coast without feeling like I have the flu.

Criminy, why didn't the doctors tell me that withdrawls were a possibility? I would've been more careful about how much I took (never more than prescribed) and would've maybe started to wean myself sooner.

Ah well, live and learn. That's all one can do with this disease!