Random Thoughts

I've haven't been blogging much lately - I was busy last week with guests and this week is Finals Week, so am busy with grading and a myriad other administrative tasks like recommendation letters, information requests from various committees, etc.

I won't be blogging much next week, either, because I will be in Bergen, Norway! I leave Sat evening and Scott is coming with me. We arrive Sunday afternoon and I presume we'll be wiped out by that time. Monday the 23rd is free, so we'll get a chance to wander around and then I'll have meetings from the 24th to the 26th. It'll be cool there, as they are at a little higher latitude than I am. I think temps should be in the mid-40s. But a change of pace will be really nice.

I'm feeling pretty well. My abdomen is still a bit tight, but other people aren't able to observe it as I stand fairly straight. If I twist, I can feel it. I'm still having to wear pants that are loose in the waist as my abdominal scar is still tender. Too many of my pants (which have been made to fit low in the waist) hit that scar, so I'm still debating how to handle it for Norway.

Two weeks post-surgery, I started taking Tykerb again and my face broke out - all over my chin and around my nose. Sigh. So, I went off it for a few days and then tried again and it broke out all over again. I went off it for a week and it cleared up. I also noticed that when I was off Tykerb I slept soo much better. I started it again on Sunday - my face is still clear, but my sleep has been disturbed and my hot flashes have been worse.

I'm debating about whether or not I should continue taking Tykerb. I know what my doc might say. My thinking is that I am doing pretty well at the moment, with low tumor markers and decent energy. Wouldn't it be better to go off it and if (and I think it's a big IF) I had a relapse, then I could go on it again and it would be more effective? When I mentioned this reasoning to my colleague, his reply was that while that might work for antiobiotics, Tykerb works differently. The belief is that Tykerb is keeping everything under control and that if I discontinue, the cancer will come back with a vengeance.

So, I started it again. I also painted my bedroom (pics will be posted sometime), and even one week later, I still got headaches. That reminded me of my carcinogenic mattress (I believe that that chemical pillowtop mattress caused my cancer to mutate and then spread to my bones and my skin), so I thought that it would be nice to have the extra insurance of the Tykerb.

But yesterday, after talking to my acupuncturist, I think that I may stay off Tykerb and not tell my oncologist and just see what happens. After all, I was off it for a month and my markers were fine. I just think that my body might be better able to fight any cancer better if I can get a good night's sleep. In other words, I think that Tykerb helps keep cancer in check, but at the cost of my sleep. Now that I'm getting stronger and rebuilding my immune system (from a Chinese medicine perspective), sleep might serve me better than Tykerb. In other words, maybe Tykerb is creating a vicious cycle in which it interrupts my sleep (waking every two hours and then having more hotflashes at night), so my body is not able to heal itself and fight off cancer, thus creating the need for more Tykerb.

I also figure that I've done or am doing lots of other things that help my body fight cancer. First, I had my ovaries removed and both of my breast cancers were estrogen positive. I also take a five-mushroom blend in pill form - three of them have been scientifically proven to be effective against cancer. I also take melatonin and as I mentioned in an earlier post, melatonin has been effective against tumor cells in mice. One of the student groups looked at light pollution and how there seems to be a correlation with cancer - they also mention that blind women have lower than average rates of breast cancer. These women don't perceive light and so their bodies are able to produce the melatonin they need for a good night's sleep. I also take turmeric which has been found to be antiinflammatory as well as effective against melanoma, a skin cancer. Turmeric helps with things like arthritis. I don't feel any ill effects from any of those herbs and I sleep better. And, I practice qi gong, still, which helps keep me centered and calm, not stressed out. That helps my immune system. As does coloring mandalas.

I've also been reading a book by Andrew Weil entitled "Spontaneous Healing". He states that by the time cancer has developed in a person's body, it means that that person's immune system has broken down. He's a proponent for doing things that build up the immune system again. Getting a good night's sleep is an important part of building one's immune system. Western medicine tends to clobber disease and illness over the head, but as it's doing that, it's clobbering the immune system as well. It's a fine balance.

So, I'm gonna experiment. It's my body, after all. I figure that I get monthly checks of my tumor markers and if they start creeping up, then it's back to Tykerb. I promise.