Camp Cot in the Sun

I spent about an hour this afternoon, laying on a camp cot in the sun in my backyard while Eddie played in the water and in his mud pit. It was the first decent day in a long time - for me anyway.

It was relaxing. I was tired and needed to close my eyes for a bit.

I had a productive morning and afternoon. Since I have to wear this silly white bandage for a week, I decided I wanted to to decorate it somehow. I could wear scarves, I suppose, but it's going to be hot this weekend (in the 80's) and couldn't bear to think how much hotter that might make my head. I finally figured out a way to take this paper tape I had (which I had been using for wounds) and color strips in a colorful pattern. Then, I took strips of the tape and put it over the white bandage I went home with yesterday.

It turned out fairly well, even if I do say so myself. I'll try to post pics tomorrow.

I tried to talk to someone at the disability insurance company but it turns out that my claims person was out today. I did find out, however, that they didn't have the paperwork from my doctor. So, I called his office to FAX the paperwork. I *think* that the records person accidentally sent me the copy meant for insurance since I ended up with two copies, so I brought it back to my doctor and they will FAX it today.

I also had to get some wound care dressings for the weakened.

I paid some bills.

I thought I found a house at the coast to rent in July, but they wanted us to rent it for a week minimum. Can't afford that, so now I need to do some more searching. Maybe tomorrow.

A friend came to visit - she ate dinner with us. Thanks, B!

Four more days of steroids. My mouth and tongue are tender. I can't eat anything spicy. I swish with Nistatin and then swallow to help keep away fungal infections. I also swish with aloe vera juice as that seems to help, too. My tummy sometimes feels gurgly so I eat crackers. My other craving is mini chocolate donuts. I don't like my tummy to get empty as it bothers me more then.

My right two fingers feel numb. Sometimes, there's a bit along the side of my right thumb does too. That should go away over time.

No big plans tomorrow except maybe to get a little wading pool for Eddie and his play in the backyard. Maybe some more summer shirts that I can wear.

Surgery Tomorrow and Other News of Today

I was actually quite busy today. I went into my office to pick up some files - I needed to contact some people about various things I said I would do this summer and either notify them I would be late or I would just not do them. But with over 3,000 emails in my inbox and not remembering when or who I was in contact with, I needed my hard copy sheets so I could follow up with them.

I also made a few phone calls about things like summer salary, disability, FMLA, insurance, etc. I need to figure out what my options are, how much to save, etc. I have a post about that, so I won't go into it here.

I also had to have my blood drawn and go see the wound care nurse. I forgot to mention that there are two smaller areas where the skin is almost all the way grown over near the bottom. In other words, almost all healed. The other larger area, up under the pit, is now about 6x3.5cm (she thought it was 5x4cm last week, but it's in an area that's hard to measure; seven days ago, it was 8x6cm. So, it's growing in nicely. It's not draining as much so less dressings. Maybe another 2-3 weeks.

I went with dad to pick Ed up from school and we ran an errand before we came home.

My colleague, M, and her husband and daughter stopped by and brought dinner and visited. It was a good visit. Thanks, M, for dinner!

I didn't take a steroid today. I took one yesterday and felt like my heart was racy and I was shaky all day. Yuck! I hardly have any numbness in my fingers, so I figure that's a good sign that there isn't much swelling. No head or nausea, either. I'll let the surgeon know that I didn't take steroids . . . I don't think it will make much of a difference. I hope that I won't have to take it afterwards, but if I do, maybe I can talk them into a smaller dose.

It seems a bit surreal to me that I head to surgery in less than 12 hours. I mean, they're opening up my head. I have reminded myself that the surgeon has already done this to me once and I was okay. This surgery is less risky and will only be 2 hours rather than 3. So, I should be okay. The radiation oncologist was surprised that I was having another surgery - this whole idea about standard of care in situations of 2 or more tumors in the brain usually means that there are cancer cells running around all over in there, so the treatment is radiation. If there is just one tumor, then surgery and radiation. When I told her that the surgeon said that I was now in the latter category and wanted to do the surgery, she said that that wasn't maybe technically correct and then she asked if my own oncologist knew what I had decided. I told her he was on vacation and didn't know. I think she's a little surprised that I would just make a decision without consulting and talking to a few docs - I might've passed the idea by Dr. K but I knew he was on vacation. So, I made the best decision I could at the time. As far as I'm concerned, the sooner we can get the thing out, the better. Then I can get to healing elsewhere instead of waiting to see if radiation worked.

Thank goodness my family lives with me

About a year and a half ago, my folks and my brother moved in with me - for financial reasons.

We have worked out a system - I pay the bills (except groceries) and they take care of the house. They do the grocery shopping, cooking, cleaning, yard work. I mean, I make sure that my areas and Eddie's areas are clean but since they are here all the time, the housework kinda fell into their hands.

It's been nice not to have to worry about grocery shopping and all that. I had plenty of other things to do with work, my own appointments and Eddie's activities. I feel very fortunate.

But this morning, I realized just how unable I am to take care of myself. I mean, I am able to wash up and wander around the house and get my own food or drink.

But I am completely unable to shop or drive or run errands, pick up or take Eddie to school. At the moment, I am homebound.

It occurred to me that other people would not have this kind of live-in help that I do. I can't even imagine how difficult it would be to have to ask for help all the time. There is something about how easier it is to ask family for help. AT least, in my case. People that I know and can talk are giving me assistance.

Last night, for instance, I decided to get a prescription sleep pill. I was able to ask dad to run to the pharmacy and I had the prescription in less than an hour. Dad is also driving me to my appointments. Scotty took Eddie to Wacky Bounce yesterday.

Thank goodness for family! Thank you, mom, dad, and Scotty. It helps tremendously!

It also occurred to me that my recoveries from these surgeries are gonna take awhile. I am now about 10 days post-surgery and can't fend for myself. I have another surgery on Wednesday and I think that I can expect at least a couple more weeks of not fending for myself afterwards. I feel a bit weak standing and walking still. This morning, I woke up and my middle finger was more numb, so I took a steroid pill. Didn't take any yesterday, but I'll take one today and see how things go. I hope after this next surgery, I won't have the numbness and unsteadiness to deal with. And, I hope I can sleep when I come home. I think my recovery will go faster if I can.

And, so it goes. I am trying to be productive - but it's things like balancing the checkbook, paying bills, etc.