Wow

I saw the surgeon yesterday and there wasn't a lot of necrotic tissue that he could clean out. He and his nurse were also quite impressed to see how much the area had changed in just one week. No more raised mound, no more Mount Herminator. The area now looks more or less like the right side. Except of course, it has a deep wound that goes down to the chest wall - about 4 cm.

It isn't draining as much. If the plastic surgeon is available, it looks like I may have the surgery in December, after the next round of Abraxane.

Also, more of the satellite tumors seem to be shrinking and disappearing as is the swollen lymph nodes elsewhere in my body.

Had lunch yesterday at Pastini's with the other models from Puttin' on the Pink (now, POP for short). I thought there was only four of us, but it ended up being about 11! It was fun! Randy Millstein, our photographer, was also there and he distributed CD's of photos of the night, including me doing the shimmy-like surf move! AS soon as I can download the photos, I will post them.

Another of the models, M, knit a pink winter hat for me. And, my colleague N gave me a new scarf and earrings plus she gave me four more beautiful scarves on long-term loan.

Eddie and I are heading to Bend today, for the night. We'll see a friend and colleague there - she has a new baby girl. I think we'll also talk about work some. And, I'll take Eddie to Sun Mountain Fun Center to play at the Arcade. We may even play in the snow. Another friend, B., who went to the coast with me last month, will join us for the trip.

All in all, life continues to be good. Good news on the cancer front; friends are giving me gifts again; I get to celebrate life this week-end. I love holidays!

A big thank you to M and N for the gifts! As I've said before and I'm sure I've said again, I have great friends!

A Belated Birthday

Today, I didn't have a lot of time between acupuncture and a meeting on campus, so I went to Famous Footeear to look for socks, to see if they had hats or scarves. My brother, Kevin, had given me a gift certificate for my birthday. I have tried to use it a couple of times, but never found anything, so I thought I would look around.

Today, the store had a sale on boots, and in the end, I found a comfy dark brown pair that come to mid-calf. So, I finLky found myself my brother's birthday gift!

Then, some old friends of mine called to invite me to dinner . . . They missed my little birthday celebration in July and now theyndecided to buy me dinner. So, of course I was free! I had a mozzarella, tomato, and basil salad! Yum!

So, thank you, Kevin, and thank you, R and T! I had a great birthday, three months after the fact!

Things are good

Today was a day when I didn't have any medical appointments! I also feel fairly normal and not tired. That is due, of course, to my blood transfusion yesterday. I thought that I might feel this burst of energy, but instead, it's more like my normal self. I like that.

I saw the wound care nurse, first, yesterday. She said when she saw how much the wound had changed in one week that it was "exciting". She said the same thing last week, too. So, I asked her why she was so excited at the changes in my wound and she replied that usually, when she and others see a cancerous wound/tumor as large as mine was, it usually keeps growing and eventually the patient goes home to die.

Whoa. I didn't realize it was as bad as that. Good thing, too! Anyway, she said that the whole area seems to be responding very well to the Abraxane treatment (which I believe is working in conjunction with the immunotherapy I had through UW). The wound/necrotic tissue has gotten smaller, from a high of 12x15 cm to what is now a 9x7 cm area. In only a few weeks, too. So, yes, I guess that it quite amazing!

I had the blood transfusion yesterday and it took about 5 hours from beginning to end. It went off without a hitch, as far as I can tell. I worked some, I called and made/rescheduled appointments, I played on facebook, I answered work emails, etc. I love all those nurses up there. They are very nice and sweet.

So, today was a good day. I met with my grad student; she now has a plan of action for the next few months. I taught my class. I have so much material I want to share with them and I always run out of time. But I guess over prepping is better than under prepping. It's a good class.

Then, I received an email about a co-authored journal article submission after I returned to my office and it got me all riled up. I won't go into details, but it seems that personal politics played a role rather than an objective reading of the article. I wrote a draft response - sent to a friend - so I can get it all out of my system. Otherwise, I might sit and fume about it.

Then again, maybe not. I think I'm changing inside and am learning to let go of stuff easier. Plus, I'm dwelling instead on the good news that after only three Abraxane treatments, I seem to be having an excellent response. Oh, and I got two cute crocheted hats in the mail today from a friend from high school. Thank you, C! Reason to celebrate! (I've said that before, huh?)

Ah, so no complaints. Life is good.

My State of Mind These Last Few Days

How am I feeling these days? In a word - happy. In love with life!

When I look back at the last few months, I see just how much my physical symptoms and side effects impacted my sense of well-being.

First, beginning around my birthday in July, I had an "inflammatory flare" in my left armpit due to the t-cell infusions and Herceptin. This inflammation caused a lot of pain and I ended up on pain pills for several weeks. So, I either felt pain, or some slight nausea and dizziness and fatigue from the pain meds.

Then, I had withdrawal symptoms from the pain meds - about late August.

Then, I ended up with an open skin wound. Got the news of disease progression and discussions with doctors about next steps. The whole area is still swollen and somewhat painful, not as bad as in July/August.

Then, I ended up with an infection in the wound and it started to grow. Fever, chills, and/or nausea/fatigue from the antibiotics. That was late September into early October. More discussions about what was going on - worry that I'd be hospitalized, worried if I should start treatment while still fighting an infection, placement of the P.A.S. port, starting a new treatment, learning about side effects.

Whew. A LOT was going on. In one sense, it was like I was a ball in a pinball machine, bouncing from one symptom and side effect to the next.

But now? Now, I am settling into a kind of routine again. Side effects are predictable. Side effects are doable - just fatigue and hair loss. My work is going well - when I'm there. I have a plan of sorts. I know what will happen in the next few months. There's evidence that the treatment is working. Mount Herminator is now a witch's cauldron. I don't have to lift my arm up constantly anymore. I can sleep on my left side again.

My heart, my soul, my mind - all feel lighter; I feel happier. A big weight has lifted. I guess because for the first time since I found out that the cancer had gone into my left lung 18 months ago, I am finally responding to treatment (t-cell therapy combined with Abraxane).

I wish to give a huge thank you to everyone who has helped me over the past six or so months. From my family who takes care of me daily, to my chauffeurs to Seattle and in Seattle, to the people who donated funds so I can make the trips, to my medical team who takes care of me, to my friends who keep me amused and entertained, to all the many people who keep me in their thoughts, prayers, who send me blessings and positive energy and little gifts. Thank you all! I have a huge wonderful support system and I can't thank you enough. Because, you see, you help me. I am doing so well because of you.

Cancer's on the run, baby. Time to celebrate!

In the Holiday Spirit - with thanks to Cat for this observation!

I had coffee with Cat and Robin and Robin's family on Saturday morning. As Cat and I walked back to her house, she observed that I am definitely in the Halloween holiday spirit!

First, I'm bald. Hair was falling out as we walked that morning.

Second, I told her that I was likely to get a blood transfusion this week (think, vampire).

Third, I told her that some of the dead tissue from the wound fell out while I was taking a shower. It's this tissue they call "slough", which is this creamy almost cheesy consistency stuff. It even sometimes acts like melted cheese, like on pizza, that has that strand of cheese that elongates . . . okay, I think you get the picture. The idea is, though, that I am like a mummy shedding flesh . . .

Now, this morning, I decided that Mount Herminator is no longer a mountain. As I mentioned, it had turned into an eagle's beak, then a floppy flapinator. Now, however, the cheesy creamy slough is located within a somewhat circular depression in my armpit - no more flap of skin over the area.

I decided it's a witch's cauldron, complete with some strange potion of dead cancerous flesh, Herminator-2 cells, and fluids. This particular potion leads to . . . no more cancer!!

Happy Halloween everyone!

That's the Plan, Man!

I saw Dr. K today . . . it was great to confirm with him that the whole area with the wound has changed - in particular, the satellite lesions are smaller and a couple of the lymph nodes are smaller. So, I am responding to the Abraxane treatment. He asked how the treatment is going in terms of side effects, and other than fatigue and hair loss, it's doable.

He also took a look at the wound - morbid curiosity he said - and I'm glad he did so that he knew better what the surgeons and the wound care nurse are seeing, And, he's willing to let the surgeons decide if and when we do surgery to remove the rest of the diseased and dead tissue and to use plastic surgery to rebuild it.

Which means that I do the next round of Abraxane treatments, through November, and if the surgeons decide to go forward with surgery, then I'd go ahead with it in mid-December. However, if the plastic surgeon is away and I end up waiting until January, I will get the third round of Abraxane treatments in December, then take a break and do surgery.

After I recover from surgery, then I would do another few months of Abraxane. AS long as I keep responding, then Dr. K would keep me on it for six months total (with a break for surgery, if that is what we decided to do).

Fine with me. So, I've got several months more of being bald. I will definitely get a Henna tattoo at some point! : )

Pictures - Fall Fun!

Here are some pics from last week, when we went to Bauman Farms in Gervais, for some fall fun!

Eddie on some of the attractions for kids:

This is a slide - he had to climb up the other side on ropes or something - in the obstacle course.

Eddie's foot and leg are there at the top of the tires.

Eddie going through a tire obstacle.

In the "Sock Hop" - a series of inflatable obstacle courses.

Lunch break.  Eddie found this very long curly fry.

The bottom of the Giant Slide.  I think it's at least 18 feet tall.

Eddie shooting out the bottom of the Giant Slide.

Eddie jumping on the Giant Jumping Pillow.  He loves it!

Resting while the kids go through the Dark Maze - Rena is playing "props" with one of the interesting shaped gourds.  One ringy dingy, two ringy dingy.

Mom called her "Gonzo" after the Muppet Show!  

We had a beautiful day playing at Bauman Farms.  I got tired, but luckily dad drove up and back.  Thanks, dad!